The lecture that we had yesterday completely shocked me; I had no idea that women were treated so badly on the internet. According to Amanda Hess’ video, for every 100 women, only 3-4 men are harassed on the internet. Also, between 2011-2012 72.5% of people that reported harassing incidents on the internet were women. As horrible as that is, the fact that only 34 states have cyber stalking laws and the police department/police officers have very limited understanding of social media sites makes it even worse. Because of this, if women are harassed on the internet, they basically have to do their own investigation, which brings back that horror and fear all over again. In the lecture before, we discussed how women are portrayed in video games. Women are portrayed as objects that need men in not only video games but also movies and music. Clearly, the harassment of women is not going to stop on the internet (and off the internet, for that matter) until women are shown as powerful, strong, and intelligent people in all realms of entertainment.
While we were in class the other day, a topic we discussed really hit home with me and my life. We talked about, and watched Anita’s post about women’s roles in video games and tropes within these games. As an avid gamer, and have been since I was too small to realize it, this realization of tropes in games hit me very hard. As I was a kid I would play mortal combat or watch my father play RPGs and later play them myself. I never really noticed the amount of dehumanizing of women characters. In these games, women are characterized by big breasts and scantly clad clothing. Growing up with these images I did not know better, and well honestly, my family never made it a big deal, so I never realized the amount masogenistic behaviors that were being represented in these games. As an adult and after watching multiple videos from Anita, I am now, more clearly seeing the problem at hand. I feel that we are teaching younger generations of women to believe this is what men what and what they should be in life, that idea alone, make. s me want to vomit. We should be teaching out girls to be strong willed and protect themselves, not wait around for someone to save them, that we, as women, are more than capable of saving ourselves.
I don’t intend to give anything away on the paper that I am writing about the Bechdel Test, however I wanted to discuss my thoughts about the topic. I began to try and brainstorm some movies that could pass the test and here are a few I thought of: The Wizard of Oz, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, The Hunger Games, The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Gone Girl, Dallas Buyers Club, and Girl Most Likely. I tried to include movies from many different genres. My point however is not to look down on the Bechdel Test, it is a very hard test to pass. The hardest part is not even the initial thinking of said movie, rather than remembering which specific scenes could possibly validate your observation. I also began to think about the question presented today regarding why might the movies with more women cost less to make. I have no facts to back this up, but my thinking would be maybe movies that include more men usually have more action and violence which would call for not only more props but also possibly stunt doubles. The Wizard of Oz, Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Girl Most Likely, and even Gone Girl probably did not qualify to have any stunt doubles therefore that alone would save tons of money. I’ve already started to learn that this topic could be discussed for forever (literally as long as movies are being produced) therefore, I will leave it at that for now.
In class we talked about the stereotypes of children of stay at home moms compared to those whose mothers worked. It’s often thought that children who have stay at home moms are spoiled and can become too attached. When I was younger, my mom stayed at home until my brother started school. From my experience, neither one of us turned out spoiled. I think that having a stay at home mom created a better bond between my mother and I. We had a closer relationship that others might have. I think that its important for moms to spend as much time as possible with their children at a young age, but as they get older its important to have a “healthy” amount of space.
Motherhood is a complicated subject, as is Parenthood in general. What is entitled in being a mother? Well when you think a good mother, what do you think of? Some examples might come from something fictional like a Disney movie. Bambi’s mother, Nemo’s mom, and Mrs. Potts from Beauty and the Beast, there are many good examples of motherhood in Disney stories. But what about real world motherhood? I am a male so I will technically never be able to experience motherhood firsthand. I do, however, have a mother and a great one at that. There are many different types of mothers and styles of parenting that exist. There are also alot of stereotypes about certain types of mothers based on lifestyle choices.
Many people assume that just because a mother stays at home, she has no career or ambitions and that the mother is a pushover and overly submissive to her husband. This is bullshit because i know personally many stay at home moms with ambitions and some of them are submissive by no means whatsoever!
There is another assumption that just because a mother has a career or a job and is busy, that she does not care or get involved in her kid’s lives personally. How far is that from the truth!
The thing is, my mother has lived both of these lives and she has not fit the stereotype at all in the slightest. When she was working long hours as a child support lawyer, she never neglected me and would drop almost anything she was doing to come to the aid of me or my sister whenever needed. And when my mother started her life as a stay at home mom, she maintained my ways to keep her career potential as a lawyer alive by attending conferences regularly, keeping license active, and by keeping in contact with her past employers and future employers. She has briefly helped with cases spottily throughout her life as a stay at home mom.
All in all, don’t listen to the damn stereotypes and assumptions about someone’s mother. Pay attention to what they actually do and most likely you will see the majority of mother’s fulfill their maternal duties constantly while maintaining their own personal life.
I thoroughly enjoyed listening to Sheryl Sandberg’s talk today about women in the workforce because it really opened my eyes to reasons why women do not have very many leadership opportunities. Something that I was surprised to learn was that men often rank themselves higher than they should and are a lot more confident in themselves. This leads to men often pursuing more leadership opportunities and jobs that they may not be fully qualified for. However, women often rank themselves lower than they should and lack the self-esteem that they deserve. This leads to women often pursuing only jobs in which they are fully qualified for and fewer leadership positions. For every one dollar that a man makes, a white working woman makes $0.77. I had no idea the gap would be so large! It is time that women realize how successful that they can be and also enjoy the success that they earn. Also, it is time that a woman’s average wage grows closer to a man’s.
In class the topic was about the best mother. I feel I disagree with society, that because a mother is a stay at home mom, that it does not make the child independent. From personal experience (not as a teen mother), my mom and dad were married. She was 22 and he was 21. He was a chief petty officer in the navy (A big title for someone that young I might add, GO DAD!) Anyways, my mom did go to college, but when she had me my dad did not want her to work, he wanted her to stay at home (she could work if she wanted to). As from what my mom told me she did not regret it at all, she said she was able to say she attended the mother teas and lunches when I was younger. Most mothers cannot say that because they are working. You know what else? My grandmother who is a nurse also did the same thing, instead she had five kids, she also went back to school and my grandfather was supportive and a big help with things that needed to done around the house. This was also the same for my great grandparents. Call me cliché, but I actually would like to do the same. I want to FIRST get my degree in nursing and also become a nurse practitioner AND THEN have a family. My point is, I don’t want people thinking that it is just a terrible thing to be a stay at home mom 🙂